The Parkade
I've been catchingl the odd ad on TV for a show that lets you hear the wail of a sasquatch. So much so that I recognized that sound twice now when exiting my vehicle on a high floor of the parkade at my downtown office. It's either a sasquatch awakening to the cold morning temperatures, or some sort of road construction equipment making a similiar sound way off in the distance. Whatever, the noise is mournful and makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck right in the heart of the city!
That parkade is quite the place. The ceilings are low and there's really only room on the ramps between the many floors for one car at a time. Because one ramp services two floors, I travel up 13 flights and down 13 flights every single day...My dad would be horrified that I might get big arms, but it hasn't happened. Really, one arm doesn't ever get stronger than the other from turning the steering wheel, because its equidistant. I think it also helps with the batwing problem that many women tend to develop...mine, as it turns out, aren't even as bad as that girl on "The Sweetest Thing" movie...You know, the one that was on the TV show "Married With Children". (Probably because I have much more body fat than she)! I thought that trek up the 13 flights would get on my nerves, but strangely enough, the parkade does the opposite and soothes me instead for some reason. The sunlight shines in at all different places and is something new every day. The pigeons that used to inhabit the place, especially those relieving themselves randomly on my floor and right at the threshold to the elevator/stairwell area, seem to have vacated the premises, at least for the time being. At times, the wind, rain, and/or snow whip through the open spaces and leave water or ice on the floors. There are barrels of salt and gravel around so the surfaces get these treatments to avoid ice build up. Overall though, from first-hand experience, I know you always have to be careful about black ice after September, since the concrete walls and posts are very unforgiving when you hit them. I am not alone in this. I witnessed a colleague backing out who peeled off her passenger side mirror on one of the big posts. She was so embarrassed and worried about what her husband would say. ..especially since it wasn't due to black ice. :-) Later when I saw her, she told me the amount of the bill and it was astronomical. I, sympathized because I myself, had at one time seriously misjudged how much room I had turning left into the vacant spot across from mine. My vehicle still has a little scratch on it. I get to park right next to a wall, so usually back in. That way my passenger door is against the wall, and I can actually get out of my vehicle.
In the last few years, because of car break-ins I assume, parkade attendants have emerged. These have all been male immigrants who are very respectful, friendly, and serious about their jobs. They all have had something in common though...having a hard time staying warm given our prairie winter weather. Imagine coming from a hot country to here and finding a job where you have to stand or walk around all shift on ice cold concrete. They are allowed to enter the stairwell where it's warm and watch out the window for trespassers, and that's what you sometimes see. I absolutely do not blame them. Not surprisingly, several have come and gone from this challenging position....One used to wrap himself in a blanket in addition to his winter coat and walked around shivering every solid day for months. One tended to be quite stern and even acted like a traffic cop going out into the busy street, stopping the fast moving traffic in order to help stream the parkade drivers out. I, for one appreciated it, because we are not far from one of the bridges. If there is an accident on the bridge, traffic can become grid-locked in short order. I have sat in my vehicle waiting to get out of the parkade for a couple of hours on more than one occasion. I know Saskatoon drivers were not ready for his actions, but it was okay by me! He's gone now and I don't know the details of his departure. I think a new company may have taken over because there seems to be more than one attendant. The common denominator is that whoever is working stands guard at at a fixed spot close to the entrance moreso than I have ever seen before. I smile, wave glibly, or nod my head every time I go by and they always make a similiar gesture in return. They can tell we belong by our colourful parking tag hanging from our rearview mirror. It's funny to see cars that don't belong. Generally, they are teens heading for the roof...you can use your imagination. Other times, they are older folks who try to look nonchalant and think if one stays in the vehicle, the other can just "run in ". I'm not sure how the new parking guards handle this, but I can imagine.
Electronic doors were installed at the entrance and exit lanes a few years back. All day they are left wide open, but after hours you have to swipe a FOB to open the entrance door. On exit the door sensor recognizes the vehicle and the door automatically opens up. This, however, does not always work as one of my colleagues can attest to. Last winter, and before the new group of attendants started, more than once, you would go to drive out and see several of the large and long overhead electrical cables ripped out and dangling on the ground just at the exit. This does not give you a good feeling whatsoever. Had to have been vandals is all I can think.
The parkade elevator is definitely one of a kind. I have to say, ("touch wood"), that it has most often been quite a reliable unit for me. For others, maybe not. It is not the smooth, sophisticated type that you might find elsewhere. I am not exaggerating when I say it is very rough around the edges. I say this because it is notorious for bouncing up and down like a trampoline. It seem like its held together with massive rubber bands. Honestly, at each floor, as it comes to a stop, it physically bounces up and down about three to four inches, three to four times in rapid succession...with you in it, I might add. It creaks loudly with every bounce so that no matter what floor you're on, you can hear it coming. Bouncing and creaking on every stop all the way up to you or back down again. When you first start riding it, you pray like crazy every trip. Incidentally, people generally only ride it going up...I think we probably hold some sort of record for people using the stairs on the way down and now you know why. As a matter of fact, I run down 13 flights pretty well every day. Occasionally, I take the stairs up, but I don't like the feeling that my lungs are bleeding by the time I reach the top. All the newcomers to the workplaces in the buildings surrounding the parkade get started out parking on the top two floors and the fear in them is quite palpable. You can see it in their eyes on the first bounce. They laugh that nervous little laugh that people tend to get when they're scared, and you just try not to embarrass them and go about putting them at ease. Now I know what airline pilots go through. I don't usually see the same newcomer twice, so I don't know what happens to them. I do know that they haven't ridden enough to know to press the Ground Floor button when they reach the top floor. They just get off and forget to send it back down to the rest of us...bless their hearts. We forgive them though, because we were there once and know they are traumatized. They soon will learn that the thing takes forever and get the hint without somebody being tempted to put up a sign (like me). They either quit their jobs or get moved to a lower floor I guess. I don't know how that happens because my whole office is still relegated to parking on a really high floor. Guess you have to have pull to get moved down, but the last time I had pull was when I was a little kid. Regardless, I for one have come to enjoy and think fondly of our idosyncratic elevator. Not only is it not boring, but you get to share it with all types of people you don't even know. They are every profession you can think of and dressed in all types of different fashion and baggage and it's truly an experience. Some speak, and some do not, some have flowers or shopping bags full of stuff...but in general, at least 80%, at the end of the day, will wish you a friendly "good evening" and that is a friendly and heartwarming thing to do, don't you think?
The parkade is attached to my building, but you have to go outside the stairwell through a door to the back alley and back in through at least three more doors. Me, I have three more to go through after that before I can actually put the key in my personal office door. All in all, I have to open seven doors between my vehicle and my office. Do you think that might be just a titch excessive, well...you can get used to anything....As Anthony Hopkins says to Alec Baldwin in "The Edge".... "what one man can do another man can do" and "today I am going to kill the bear"....If you have not seen the movie....do so, it's great! Out back of the parkade is a back alley area surrounded and shared by several big buildings. There is a built-in ashtray for smokers and they are often crowded around shivering, catching a quick puff. At certain times of the day, if you are lucky enough, you will see a street person rifling through the ashtray looking for cigarette butt. These are some of the joys of parking downtown! At least you can't say it's boring and I have yet to run into a sasquatch!
